Islamic Pigs (Al-Qaeda's Latest Recruits?)

No before anyone comments on my exceptionally racist post title, it isn't to be taken literally. You see i meant it in the literal sense, not the metaphor. I today read in my local newspaper that pigs had savagely attacked an anti-terrorist policeman with a dog, who were checking out the New Forest(?) for terrorism in the area.

I quote:

"Pig attacks in the New Forest have prompted safety warnings after a fallen rider was attacked, and a police officer and his dog checking for terrorists were chased by the herd."

The pigs are feared to be the latest in a long line of Islamic converts.

Jack Straw said that the motives of the pigs would have been clearer if they had removed their veils, and that the police officer would have been entitled to "shoot-to-kill." He can also be quoted saying:

"Pigs are very intelligent and inquisitive and usually friendly. They should have made it clearer that they wouldn't have attacked if the policeman and the rider had stayed still. The motives of the pigs seem harmless enough and they won't receive the death penalty."

He also states that it was made harder to communicate with the pigs when the policeman couldn't see their face.

Another line of inquiry that is being investigated is that the pigs, under Al-Qaeda's command, were clearing the area in the New Forest of people that could discover the latest bomb attempt. The policeman was actually an MI5 operative sent to go undercover at the nuclear bomb factory, believed to be deep in the heart of the Forest. Upon entry to the secret facility, he was brutally assualted by pigs and left for dead.

So there's the latest conspiracy uncovered for all to see. :)

Jetstar